How to survive Valentine's Day by pretending it doesn't exist

A few Februarys ago, I went for lunch with a friend and was served a devastating blow. 

As I ordered a club sandwich, I caught her eyeing me nervously. "So, I have some news," she said in a hesitant tone. There was an agonising suspenseful pause. 

"Oh god," I said. My heart was beating so fast I thought it might leap...